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Enough Already!

I know, I know I’m behind schedule with this post, truthfully, it’s been busy we have been working on a number of hiring campaigns in the valley and Canada no less, it’s less shiny than it sounds, late nights on the phone with everyone I call surprised I’m not a cretin, because I have the recruiter title on my LinkedIn profile :/

I’m also not kidding myself. Let’s be honest, I doubt you are all eagerly waiting for my blog to land in your inbox. That said, the follower’s number has been ticking upwards each week, so sincerely thanks for the support.

I will do a deal with each of you now between you, the reader, and me. I will never become a guru!

Is it just me or is the world becoming a busier place, we all need to wake at 05:30 jump in an ice bath, go for a run all while maintaining the perfect diet and being the best version of ourselves, and where the hell did I leave my why? I’m sure I had it when I left the house, how can I get through the day without it? Thank god I have atomic habits to fall back on while I’m living my rich life. Holy moly! It’s not even 9:00 yet.

So here is my 2 penny’s worth…

The Bulk of this is BS designed to get us to part company with our cash via online courses telling us what we already know.

THE END. A short blog this month… Wait, WAIT! I’m kidding, I’m not done yet.

On a serious note, I’m hoping this month’s blog will be a sanity check, and allow each of us to strip our lives back to a simpler time where we all managed to cope without someone telling us how to live our lives.  Cou – Stephen Bartlett– gh!  I see this man in my sleep get off my LinkedIn feed man, if I see another squiggly line telling me this is what progress looks like I’m going to try to drown myself in the coffee pot.

So here it is, the basics, based on placing 1000’s of individuals into new roles, chatting with 100,000’s of decent members of society from grads, mid-career professionals, founders, millionaires through to the guy who lost it all.

Reality Check

You cannot control your life! “are you talking about a higher power here mark? are we all just puppets, in a tapestry designed to entertain”.  No, that’s not where I’m going with this.

I’m saying planning your life’s work today is foolish, locking in the future version of yourself today only to find that you have been thrown a curve ball, you have a health scare, your marriage breaks down, you get made redundant, war breaks out, is a surefire way to disappointment.

We do not know what is coming down the line, so making rigid plans that you see in your mind as a good outcome, or a bad one, is too simplistic and will set you up for a life of frustration.

You have permission to simply ‘be’ yep switch off Tony Robinson's sweaty brow, stop your whooping, just ‘be’… for a moment… breathe, appreciate where you are.

I can’t find the post but many years ago there was a young Australian woman on Facebook who was dying of cancer, her final post spoke about just living your life, spending time with friends, family, take that walk, feel the sun on your face. Your life, whatever it is, is enough.

I haven’t done her justice here, but I guess I’m saying don’t overlook everything you have by looking at everything you don’t. Many would swap the trappings of the ‘Insta’ life their money brought them to appreciate the simple things. Don’t believe me? Read the Will Smith autobiography, ask yourself why do many of the world’s richest people look lost? Elon’s a mess. There is a man looking for something. The Trump…WOW! Just wow.

But Tony told me “If you can’t, you must. If you must, you can.” What the hell does that even mean? Click that unsubscribe button and get back to reality.

So, we have choice. Every day the small changes you make will move you towards or away from the bigger picture, but we have ‘influence’ not ‘control’. Not knowing what the next 20 years of your life look like is a brilliant thing. It’s a freeing thing that rids you of the fallacy of sunken costs. You can decide to go in whatever direction you choose, but there is a compromise.

Sacrifice:

Boooo! But my latest guru told me I can sit on the beach or use my laptop by the pool working 4 hours a day and be fulfilled. So fulfilled he needs to sell me a course so I can follow his lifestyle tips… Why is he selling you a course when they have all this passive income coming in? hmmm could it be that the passive income is you?!? Surely not, I’m sure all of them made their millions downloading a course on the internet and following it, yea that makes perfect sense to me!

No people here is the rub, everything you say ‘yes’ to and invite in to your life you say ‘no’ to something else. If you want to drop your kids off at school and tuck them in at night and you choose to do that rather than take a business to a 1 gazillion exit in 7 years, then that choice is fine. Live your life, no one else’s.

Is it possible to build a company and have meaningful time with loved ones? Maybe, but as a founder, I know I have given my time to people and projects that affected my family and, in hindsight, I would not have done it. The fast car, big house… that’s time invested. That hour can only be given towards something or someone once.

Covet:

So, life is fluid, and I can’t have everything I want without sacrifice.

Is anyone interested in signing up to my “make a million by giving up areas of your life to work hard on something” online course?

No! Yep, it’s not exactly a great sell, is it? But this is reality. Everyone you look at telling you otherwise is lying.

In 23 years working with exited founders, investors, and everyone in between other than the trust fund kids, you better believe they sacrificed to buy those shiny things.

So, what do you work towards? Well, that’s up to you but before you focus on what you want from life, be sure to focus on what is most important to you, ‘covet’ it and wrap it in bubble wrap and Kevlar, the minute you find yourself sacrificing that coveted item STOP!

You may not be able to get it back or your choices may mean you will never have it. What did I say earlier about sacrifice?

Come on, we only just spoke about this.

Everything you say ‘yes’ to means you’re saying ‘no’ to something else.

Be sure it’s not that item you covet. When you’re in the thick of it, you can lose sight of it, so take a moment to wrap those things that are most precious up now.

Says the guy who had a double bleed on the brain by having 4 hours sleep a night for 18 months. I said I’m not a guru! I got it wrong, I still get plenty wrong, this is just us chatting, don’t judge 😀

In the moments usually after a few beers, I’m chatting to those that ‘made it’. It’s always those coveted items that they regret losing along the way. Some would willingly give up the Insta worthy life they have, to get it back. Though not all of them got it wrong. Those individuals were really clear about boundaries in their lives.

Happy Tax:

This is an exercise I have completed with a number of execs over the years. They found themselves conflicted with the prospect of a pay cut versus living the life they want to live.  Huh! so money can’t buy me the life I want? No, financial security and choice is possible, but ‘Time’ is the real commodity we have to trade with.

No amount of money can give you a ‘do over’, you can’t head to the cash point and withdraw another ten years.

So back to the exercise, I would ask them to describe their perfect week, work factored in there and purpose, but there was also time with kids, friends, pass times, losing the sweaty commute on the subway or tube from their week, etc.

I would ask them how much each of those various elements they were trying to achieve was worth to them in financial terms. The total bill was referred to as happy tax. It was no longer a pay cut, it was an investment in to the new life they wanted.

The Mirage

There are no shortcuts. ‘Manifesting’ is daydreaming, nothing more! Passive income comes from working your ass off and putting your cash into something that generates a passive income. It doesn’t fall out of the sky, you earn the right to it through blood, sweat and tears.

You can’t walk towards two separate outcomes for your life. You don’t have to walk a direct route but you do need to move in the same direction, so be sure the one you are seeking isn’t a mirage created by Social Media.

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